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How to ask a friend if they are gay

how to ask a friend if they are gay

by Fred Penzel, PhD

This article was initially published in the Winter edition of the OCD Newsletter. 

OCD, as we know, is largely about experiencing severe and unrelenting doubt. It can cause you to suspect even the most basic things about yourself – even your sexual orientation. A study published in the Journal of Sex Research found that among a group of college students, 84% reported the occurrence of sexual intrusive thoughts (Byers, et al. ). In order to have doubts about one’s sexual identity, a sufferer need not ever contain had a homo- or heterosexual experience, or any type of sexual trial at all. I hold observed this symptom in young children, adolescents, and adults as well. Interestingly Swedo, et al., , launch that approximately 4% of children with OCD encounter obsessions concerned with forbidden aggressive or perverse sexual thoughts.

Although doubts about one’s own sexual identity might seem pretty straightforward as a symptom, there are actually a number of variations. The most evident form is where a sufferer experiences the reflection that they might be of a different sexual orientation than they formerly believed. If the sufferer is heterosexual

How Do I Ask a Girl If She’s Womxn loving womxn or Queer?

Despite more people than ever feeling free to come out as their authentic selves, a common lesbian struggle remains – figuring out whether a girl is queer. Although being queer doesn’t need to be defined by a ‘look’, it can be especially rigid to tell when she doesn’t meet those ‘stereotypical’ characteristics. If your gaydar is going off, but you’re not quite certain, there are many ways you can go about asking someone if they are gay or in the LGBTQ+ spectrum.

If you’re romantically interested in this person, it might touch like a nerve-wracking conversation to bring up. Putting yourself out there is hard, but it’s only when we step out of our comfort zones that we can build connections with others! If you still can’t carry yourself to ask the big question, “Are you gay or what?” don’t fret. There are plenty of more subtle ways you can approach the subject of sexuality.

Keep reading to learn how to ask your girl passion if she’s gay, as well as what to do with your respond to take things to the next level.

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Just Ask!

The most apparent way to ask if a girl is lgbtq+ is to just ask – plain and uncomplicated. You can ask upfront,

If you feel burned out on coming up with questions for a first date, you&#;re not alone! The ritual of first dates can often perceive repetitive and lackluster. There are only so many ways to ask a version of so what are your interests? And if you&#;ve already been chatting a bit on the apps or during the direct up to a go out (which, for the write down , I somewhat advise against unless that&#;s truly your preference for getting to know someone!), it can be even harder to know what to tell on a first meet. But asking questions is important. If you display up to a meet and only answer the other person&#;s question or otherwise only talk about yourself, trust you&#;re probably about to get subtweeted or roasted in a group chat. There is no perfect roadmap for how to crush a first date, but the number one thing you can do to at least ensure a baseline decent experience is request your date(s) about themselves!

The questions below are planned to inject some existence and creativity back into your first date interrogate asking if you&#;re feeling stuck or stalled in the dating process. You can ask them synonyms for word or utilize them to riff and come up with your own against-the-grain questions. They&#;ve been di

Asked my boyfriend if he was gay, and experience awful now. Help!
April 5, AM   Subscribe

Questioned my boyfriend's sexuality realize I may have crossed a line. Help please?


Hey everyone,

Let me give you some background info.

My best friend of many years is currently going through a divorce because two months ago, her husband came out of the closet and is now openly gay with a coworker. The three of us (my ally, her husband, and I) have been close friends for about 7 years. They dated for 3 years and would acquire been married 3 years next month. We all felt very comfortable with each other and, having gone through high college and college together, felt like we knew each other inside and out. Needless to say, both my friend and I were completely blindsided by her husband's coming out, my friend especially. She has been having a rough time processing her divorce and the proof that someone who was gay all along married her in the first place.

Now onto my boyfriend: we have been together about 3 months now, and he is a really great guy. He recently started a new job and is good friends with his male boss. They communicate each other and attach out outside of function and I re

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