Middle age gay
What No One Tells You About Being A Middle-Aged Gay
Embracing aging as a gay man can be an overwhelming and liberating experience&#;
By Jumol Royes
Gay society is youth obsessed. That’s not breaking news.
Yet not even the gay glitterati have figured out how to stop the hereditary clock and put a halt to the aging process.
I turned 40 recently and was forced to reckon with the amazing expectations this birthday is burdened with. After remembering that birthdays are simply temporal markers that we use to remind ourselves, and each other, that we’re still here taking up space, I got to thinking about all the things no one tells you about becoming a middle-aged gay man.
For starters, you don’t acquire an email or device notification reminding you to change your Grindr tags and tribes from twink, twunk or cub to bear, daddy or zaddy, for those of you with a little extra swagger in your step.
Planning to meet up for drinks with a guy from the dating app? Be prepared to possibly spend more money than you accounted for when you discover that you’re not only responsible to pay for your hold drinks, but to cover the tab of the hottie you’re hoping to hook up with. C
Gay Life after 40
Hello, my name is William Smith, the founder of Lgbtq+ Life After
Our motto is &#;Keep Aging Forward.&#;
I grew up in Kenosha, Wisconsin, between Milwaukee and Chicago. I worked and lived in Chicago for approximately 20 years.
We acquire two online platforms:
The first is a Facebook Team called Gay Life after It’s a private community for gay men over
I was inspired to start this Group after seeing a void in presenting ourselves and having meaningful discussions in our age group. I was opposed to middle-aged men uploading images of themselves when as adults, they were at an age where their experiences had substance and dialogue.
Gay Animation After 40 has 42, members and is growing rapidly. It has grow one of the largest gay Facebook groups in the country. We wish men to interact with each other, learn, seek questions, and engage. We do not talk about politics. Everything else is ok.
To generate provocative discussions within the group, I spend time with other men to understand their thoughts and questions, which allows me to seek the group about more topics. The posts on our site include both posts and questions.
Gay Men in Mid-Life: Now What?
You bought the condo. You got the position. You might even hold the boyfriend. You came out. You made friends. You saved for retirement.
You took the trip. You ate the food. You posted the photos.
And yet, you wonder: Is this all there is?
For many of us, these are the experiences of homosexual men at midlife.
We consume the first half of our lives doing and striving. And when most of the goals are met, we feel confused and disappointed.
Everyone talks about getting, but no one talks about what happens after you get it. It doesn’t seem right to complain about having a lot.
If we sprint away from this discomfort we may end up with too many hangovers, too much time on the internet, or too many disappointing hook ups.
Things get interesting if we stay curious about this uncomfortable experience of “blah”. Underneath the boredom or light depression is a rich world of feelings and a new vision waiting to be discovered.
For most men, the first half of life is about building a being and building the nature. The external takes most of our energy and commitment.
In the second half of life, men often start to pay more attention to the internal realm to figure out what i
Gay Midlife Crisis: It’s a Thing
Therapists don’t often split their own life stories. Our focus is on you, not us. But sometimes what we’ve learned from our personal challenges can inspire our clients. So here goes.
A couple of years ago my life looked great. In fact, some would narrate it has “gay heaven.” I really did own it good. I had:
a wonderful LGBTQ relationship of 25 years (and the sex was still good)
a great apartment in San Francisco (and a view)
loving friends and family (with people I could explain anything)
an adorable dog (I am not being biased — everyone said she was the cutest canine ever)
meaningful work as an LGBTQ therapist (and a full practice)
the appropriate amount of money saved for retirement for a person of my age (that’s what the financial planner said)
good health and a super cute trainer. (No photos available)
It doesn’t find much better than that, right? And yet, I surprised myself when suddenly I wasn’t happy and sometimes slightly depressed.
I didn’t understand it. I had already done years of personal work with therapy, workshops, reading, yoga, meditation, and watching the occasional Oprah show. I had healed childhood issues and cleaned up
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