Am i bisexual or lesbian
Bisexual stories from IRL women on how they figured out their sexuality
Figuring out your sexuality can grab a long time — and it’s no other for bisexuals. Add in bi-erasure and the still all-too-prevalent misconceptions about bisexuality; coming to terms with your bisexuality can be tricky.
“Being unsure about whether or not you’re bi is actually Bi Culture,” says Jen Winston, author of GREEDY: Notes From a Bisexual Who Wants Too Much. “You may think that uncertainty makes you more unbent, but it actually makes you more bisexual.”
So, if you’re wondering, ‘Am I bisexual?’, or are detecting as bicurious, you want to firstly look past the stereotypes. Despite what you may have heard, bisexuality means being attracted to more than one gender. Gender, like sexuality, exists on a spectrum. It is not binary. If you are attracted to people regardless of their gender, and contain the potential to be attracted to someone of any gender, you could be pansexual. Other people might use queer. But the label you employ is up to you; there is no right or wrong when recognizing your sexuality.
Books to help you explore bisexuality
Am I bisexual?
“The first thing to note is
How Do You Know If You’re Bisexual?
A quiz can’t tell you if you’re bisexual, and bisexuality looks different for everyone. Instead, try asking yourself these questions. You can pick come out to someone you feel safe with, but only if and when you want to.
Entering your birth date, birth time, and birth urban area into an astrology website won’t tell you whether you’re bisexual.
Neither will a blood test, nasal swab, or online ask.
The guide below on bisexuality, however, may facilitate you answer that interrogate for yourself.
A filthy dream featuring a hottie of a gender you don’t typically get down with can be blazing (hello, sleep orgasm!).
But it can also be discombobulating. According to certified dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg, though, a sex hope alone isn’t reason enough to get your panties in a bunch about your sexuality.
“The only time a sex imagine may give you some inclination about your sexual orientation is if before you had the imagine you were already questioning your sexuality,” she says.
Otherwise, the sex illusion doesn’t actually represent a physical or sexual wish, but a psychological need.
While anyone of any gender can have feminine or masc
Q:
Im obviously attracted to people who dont identify with the gender binary, and Im increasingly questioning my own alignment with the heteronormative status-quo (this is new to me since Im a woman in my 40s who passes as cis, and its only in the last three years Ive realized Ive probably been lgbtq+ since my late teens).
Where Im really finding difficulty moving forward is in knowing whether Im pansexual or a lesbian. Im very clearly not linear, and I find Im far more attracted to femmes and trans folx, and even to some cis women. Im not often attracted to people who present as cis males, and the thought of sex with a man grosses me out at the moment. Im also not at all interested in another bond with a man. Where do I fall on the spectrum? I perceive this is important in being able to uncover my community of like-minded folx.
A:
Hello friend,
I don’t need to invalidate your very real anxiety about not having a label that seems to fit, because that can be very stressful, and so much of our society — and especially LGBTQ society — seems to revolve around them. But I also believe that sexual identity labels are, in my opinion, a
Things you need to realize if youre questioning whether you’re lesbian or bi
If you’re reading this, chances are you’ve discovered you like the same sex, but are not quite sure whether that makes you lesbian or bi-curious. Although we shouldn’t experience pressure to label ourselves, it can be beneficial to explore our identities.
For many queer people, figuring out one’s sexuality is not always an uncomplicated process. Sexuality is complex and can often receive confusing (and even downright overwhelming!). Your sexuality may not be so inky and white, and you may find yourself organism attracted to multiple alternative genders. On top of this, being raised in a heteronormative society can make figuring out one’s sexuality all the more complicated.
For women and nonbinary folks, it can sometimes be even more complicated to distinguish where we fall on the LGBTQIA+ spectrum. We grew up with little to no representation of queer women and nonbinary people in the media. In addition to no women-loving women romance to look up to, we’re ingrained from a young age that our purpose is to fall in love with and serve a unbent man– it was all around us, even in children’s movies! Can we start to see h
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